"The Man"
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“The sounds, wet and slimy slapping noises were coming from behind one of the tombs.”
The tale begins inside The Meadows (insane asylum). This is where we are introduced to the main character, Chloe. You get a feel for her attitude towards the other kooky (and otherwise irrelevant) characters, in a communal setting, before the orderlies enter the picture and start stirring up some shit. They say things like, “…we’ll kick the shit out of you and no one will believe you because you’re just another fucking nutter in the nut house!” A genuinely frightening thought. Chloe hears a “familiar” voice say something to the orderly who threatened her, and then the scene flashes forward to the graphic aftermath of some brutal violence which left me wondering what the hell happened. The story then takes us back in time to relive some traumatic events that led to Chloe’s homicidal madness, as the story seems to slowly but surely take on a paranormal twist before returning to the “present”. The ongoing theme in this story is me trying to decipher what is taking place in Chloe’s mind vs what is actually transpiring in the story vs whether or not any of it is making any sense to me at all.
The tale begins inside The Meadows (insane asylum). This is where we are introduced to the main character, Chloe. You get a feel for her attitude towards the other kooky (and otherwise irrelevant) characters, in a communal setting, before the orderlies enter the picture and start stirring up some shit. They say things like, “…we’ll kick the shit out of you and no one will believe you because you’re just another fucking nutter in the nut house!” A genuinely frightening thought. Chloe hears a “familiar” voice say something to the orderly who threatened her, and then the scene flashes forward to the graphic aftermath of some brutal violence which left me wondering what the hell happened. The story then takes us back in time to relive some traumatic events that led to Chloe’s homicidal madness, as the story seems to slowly but surely take on a paranormal twist before returning to the “present”. The ongoing theme in this story is me trying to decipher what is taking place in Chloe’s mind vs what is actually transpiring in the story vs whether or not any of it is making any sense to me at all.
Readability
The large amount of typos, missing words, and incorrect words used in sentences (autocorrect?) was the least frustrating thing for me, while reading this story. The poor transitions from one scene to the next often left me wondering what the hell was going on. The use of chapters to separate sections of the book basically served no purpose, as there were chapters that contained multiple scenes that did not tie together in any meaningful way. I’m not saying that the story was completely incomprehensible. There were some scenes that were cogent, and even had me sucked in, but the story does contain a lot of incomplete or fragmented sentences that didn’t make any sense to me as the reader. Near the end of the story, there was a surprise character by the name of “Marcel” that pops up out of nowhere like I’m supposed to know who the fuck he is. That confused the shit out of me, because it was the first time his name had been mentioned in the whole damn story. I thought I was heading to The Meadows. Luckily I received a clue that allowed me to connect the dots and realize that “Marcel” was actually supposed to be “Marius” from earlier in the story (a critical writer’s error). I expect anything that comes from the indie market is going to have some integral issues when it comes to quality control, but if I’m going to be completely honest - this story is essentially still a rough draft. I felt like I was reading an unfinished product.
Creativity
There are some dank and dirty metaphors in this story that really paint a demoralizing and disgusting picture. Dank and dirty, because it’s as if a broad stroke brush was used to fling fecal matter at a canvas just to see what would stick… and I could smell the shit from across the room. I think that’s what Addams was aiming for in “The Man”, as there are many explicit references to shit, piss, blood, cum, pus, and mucus in this tale of debauchery. I believe there was a bit of symbolism that connected the clown necklace and the black figure, each of which possessed “ruby red” eyes, to Chloe - whose world suddenly went “scarlet” (in more ways than one).
Delivery
“The Man” by Astrid Addams is all over the place. Only now as I reflect upon what I read, can I really hone in on what really mattered most about the whole story. I mean it was jam packed, and I mean stuffed, with melodramatic filler that was more or less irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. From Chloe rattling on about burned bridges of her past to sudden beef with her sister over arbitrary family drama, and not to mention the numerous side characters that only added to my confusion as they played no real purpose in progressing the plot (if you even want to call it that). The story mainly revolves around the relationship between Chloe and her sister, Sarah. The most entertaining scenes for me were the ones where Chloe was trying to get by as a desperate derelict, and how she was such a shameless degenerate. The scene where Chloe’s ex-boyfriend Liam and his family took her to task on some sleazy daytime television show was hilarious to me. I honestly got a kick out of that, and thought it was a brilliant way to kick off Chloe’s downfall. I thought the story would have been so much better if Addams had focused more on developing that gritty realistic feel as Chloe struggled to get back on her feet, having to “rely” on people’s kindness - but at the same time she believed she was “putting up” with them. Those were the bits and pieces (pun intended) where I thought Addams really delivered in this story. I saw Chloe as an individual who refused to take agency and believed bad things just happened to her just because, who always felt like she was the one being used by people when in fact she was the abuser/user. The way in which the little party scene was described felt realistic me, as if I was there. Those were the scenes that sucked me into the story and kept me reading. As soon as the murder report came to the forefront the storyline began to untie and by the end it had become extremely frayed with loose ends.
The large amount of typos, missing words, and incorrect words used in sentences (autocorrect?) was the least frustrating thing for me, while reading this story. The poor transitions from one scene to the next often left me wondering what the hell was going on. The use of chapters to separate sections of the book basically served no purpose, as there were chapters that contained multiple scenes that did not tie together in any meaningful way. I’m not saying that the story was completely incomprehensible. There were some scenes that were cogent, and even had me sucked in, but the story does contain a lot of incomplete or fragmented sentences that didn’t make any sense to me as the reader. Near the end of the story, there was a surprise character by the name of “Marcel” that pops up out of nowhere like I’m supposed to know who the fuck he is. That confused the shit out of me, because it was the first time his name had been mentioned in the whole damn story. I thought I was heading to The Meadows. Luckily I received a clue that allowed me to connect the dots and realize that “Marcel” was actually supposed to be “Marius” from earlier in the story (a critical writer’s error). I expect anything that comes from the indie market is going to have some integral issues when it comes to quality control, but if I’m going to be completely honest - this story is essentially still a rough draft. I felt like I was reading an unfinished product.
Creativity
There are some dank and dirty metaphors in this story that really paint a demoralizing and disgusting picture. Dank and dirty, because it’s as if a broad stroke brush was used to fling fecal matter at a canvas just to see what would stick… and I could smell the shit from across the room. I think that’s what Addams was aiming for in “The Man”, as there are many explicit references to shit, piss, blood, cum, pus, and mucus in this tale of debauchery. I believe there was a bit of symbolism that connected the clown necklace and the black figure, each of which possessed “ruby red” eyes, to Chloe - whose world suddenly went “scarlet” (in more ways than one).
Delivery
“The Man” by Astrid Addams is all over the place. Only now as I reflect upon what I read, can I really hone in on what really mattered most about the whole story. I mean it was jam packed, and I mean stuffed, with melodramatic filler that was more or less irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. From Chloe rattling on about burned bridges of her past to sudden beef with her sister over arbitrary family drama, and not to mention the numerous side characters that only added to my confusion as they played no real purpose in progressing the plot (if you even want to call it that). The story mainly revolves around the relationship between Chloe and her sister, Sarah. The most entertaining scenes for me were the ones where Chloe was trying to get by as a desperate derelict, and how she was such a shameless degenerate. The scene where Chloe’s ex-boyfriend Liam and his family took her to task on some sleazy daytime television show was hilarious to me. I honestly got a kick out of that, and thought it was a brilliant way to kick off Chloe’s downfall. I thought the story would have been so much better if Addams had focused more on developing that gritty realistic feel as Chloe struggled to get back on her feet, having to “rely” on people’s kindness - but at the same time she believed she was “putting up” with them. Those were the bits and pieces (pun intended) where I thought Addams really delivered in this story. I saw Chloe as an individual who refused to take agency and believed bad things just happened to her just because, who always felt like she was the one being used by people when in fact she was the abuser/user. The way in which the little party scene was described felt realistic me, as if I was there. Those were the scenes that sucked me into the story and kept me reading. As soon as the murder report came to the forefront the storyline began to untie and by the end it had become extremely frayed with loose ends.
#LFLR Indie Rating: 4/10
So I actually had no idea this story was going to be as graphic as it was. The description had me believing that this story was going to be a gritty psychological horror, which I think it would have been a lot better if it had been. With all the writing errors as well as the confusing and at times frustrating storyline, I cannot in good conscience recommend this title to anyone (even at ninety nine cents). However, if you’re just chomping at the bit to find out how sick and depraved “The Man” is – then at least I can tell you that it’s free to read with Kindle Unlimited.
So I actually had no idea this story was going to be as graphic as it was. The description had me believing that this story was going to be a gritty psychological horror, which I think it would have been a lot better if it had been. With all the writing errors as well as the confusing and at times frustrating storyline, I cannot in good conscience recommend this title to anyone (even at ninety nine cents). However, if you’re just chomping at the bit to find out how sick and depraved “The Man” is – then at least I can tell you that it’s free to read with Kindle Unlimited.
THIS BREAKDOWN IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE #LFLR NETWORK.